Self Care

Picture this: 7am – 8am Three boys, three uniforms, three lunches, three breakfasts, three toothbrushes, three hair styles, three back packs, three car seats, library day, camp forms, soccer cleats, one meltdown, let the cat out, let the cat in, feed the cat, one very large cup of coffee, one very messy kitchen, three booster seats, one 10 minute drive to school… on the way to school I have a myriad of thoughts that I cannot say out loud due to 6 very precious ears.  Things like… Dear car ahead of me, the gas pedal is to the right of the break pedal and if you would just apply a little more pressure you could actually go the speed limit.  Dear other driver, if you turn the steering wheel at the same time as you press the gas pedal miracles can happen.  Dear other other driver, I didn’t know your vehicle didn’t come with an indicator… you might want to put that on the feedback form at your local dealership.  It’s my facetious nature that on one hand keeps me laughing, and on the other reminds me that I’ve forgotten to look after myself.  Just as this awareness is being brought to light my foot hits the break pedal with just a little too much enthusiasm and my almond butter toast sails off the passenger seat and lands on the floor of the car!  If the world would just cooperate I could actual get my kids to school on time and just maybe I can still eat that piece of almond toast!  I have no patience left, no love… the world around me is agitating my soul!  I have given all I had in the early hours of a school day morning to those three little beings whom I love so much.  Its funny how they wake up ready to embrace the world and an hour after I wake up I’m ready to go to tell the world what I really think of it.  So what do we have to do to shake things up?  How do we fall back in love with our world?  What I really need to know is how on earth do I find more patience?  For each person it looks a little bit different, however if you are going to engage in the endlessly giving role of parenthood I would invite you to think of extremely creative and wonderful ways to take the most excellent care of yourself.  So seeing as I love to share, and write, I will invite you into my world of self care, as I’m sure the drivers of the world want to know that when I am diligent in this process I have compassion for them too.  Every morning I get up a full half hour before my kids… I sit on the couch, under a faux fur throw, sip my hot coffee, and contemplate my day.  I ask myself two questions… What is one small thing I can do for myself today?  What is one thing, that when accomplished, I will feel a small weight lift off my shoulders.  Small things for myself include… 10 minutes of yoga in front of the fireplace, a tall, non-fat, no water Chai latte at Starbucks, afternoon tea and popcorn, reading a magazine, calling my sister, mom, dad, or brother, stopping at Purdy’s for a salted milk chocolate caramel… larger things include joining the local swim team, actually attending a yoga class, making time for one visit to the gym/ week, dancing till the wee hours of the morning with my good friends… oh and blogging of course… as I love write!  On the accomplished side I do things like, fix the dining room chair,  get a quote for outdoor house maintenance, cut the grass, file the bills etc…No they are not my favourite things to do, but we all have responsibilities and once complete they free my thoughts and allow me to enjoy so many other facets of my life. 

As a parent coach I love to ask questions that help parents really connect to those things that fill them up.  Ask yourself, what did I love to do before I became a parent?  What fills me up   and gives me patience to take on my kids and leave me with compassion for the rest of the world?

Hope to see some of you on the dance floor!

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Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.

Helen Keller