Better than you?
Does somebody else think they can do it better?
Preface: this blog is intended to make you laugh… and for those who give unwanted advice it is intended to make you stop. Be supportive, Be Compassionate, Be Understanding, Be Helpful, Be Kind – just love, its much easier that way. Oh and I never claimed that I am doing this whole parenting gig ‘right’, I am just doing the best I can. It’s the perfectly imperfect me…
Do you ever notice that everyone seems to have an opinion on how to raise your kid’s. Whether it’s the grandmother on the street, a medaling relative, the author who wrote the latest parenting book, the other moms on the playground or the onlookers who watch you manage a meltdown in the grocery store. I find this so odd. They don’t know me or my husband or my kids for that matter. They don’t know what else has happened in my day, my month or the last year. They don’t know that I have already told my child 17 times not to do something and on the 18th time I say it with a little vim and vigor and now a complete stranger, or relative, or other parent on the playground thinks I am doing the entire thing wrong! This non supportive environment for parents alike annoys me so I have finally come up with a solution for all of these parents who feel at times they may know slightly more than I or they feel they have a birds eye view and if only I would listen. Here is my answer to all of them. It is difficult enough to raise children today. We live in a society where many cultural views and ideals about parenting are mixed into one. We each have different levels of support and we are all under different levels of pressure from time to time, or shall I say from moment to moment when you are raising kids. So with that in mind unless you want to tell me how beautiful I look or what a fabulous mother I am or how wonderful my kids are please refrain from the judgmental stares and the kind words of unhelpful advice. If you are really adamant that I am doing something horribly wrong or something that offends you in ways that I may not understand I encourage you to take all three of my children for a minimum of a month and please keep tabs on the following:
- Good Nutrition for all Meals – Including Manners at the Table
- Sleep Requirements met each night – 10 to 12 hours please
- Uniforms/Clothes cleaned and presented each morning
- Clean Home
- All areas Tidy – and yes clean and tidy are two completely separate things
- Homework done every night – If they play an instrument please add 10 – 15 minutes a night of practice. All children love to be read too or they can read to you.
- Hygiene maintained at all times – teeth need to be flossed or the dentist bill     could be high. Nails kept trimmed please. Regular baths or showers –     boys love those.
- Sibling Love – please ensure the arguing, bickering and fighting are kept to a     minimum and that you spend individual time with each child to combat issues between the siblings
- Extracurricular Activities – please ensure that you pack a bag for each activity including a snack and a water bottle and necessary apparel – preferably they should be trained to help so please include a program in which you teach them the values of looking after their own things. If they play hockey please ensure you wash the jersey, jock and socks every time and lay out the clothes to dry. It’s best if they are on time for each activity.
- Technology does interfere with brain development so really all devices should be kept to a minimum, if at all.
- Lunches – I find it best to make these the night before – you may be exhausted yet it really pays off to have it done. Down a cup of tea/coffee around 4 or 5pm if needed, but who am I to give advice.
- Emotions – there will be tears etc. Be sure to maintain a good connection about friends at school and life in general. It sounds like you have lots of experience in how to emotionally support children. I won’t interfere.
- Values – So important that they have good morals and that they are kind,     compassionate loving souls. I am sure you have lots of ideas and ways to grow this part of their being.
Stamina is the name of the game. I will be in Tahiti if you need me – but by the sounds of it you’ve got this and I haven’t been doing it quite right. Thank goodness you are here to set me straight and help raise my kids. I clearly needed this break. I am sure you will manage. When you were giving me advice I really felt you had this whole gig in the bag. I would wish you luck but I know you won’t need it.
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